That this space would be drivel. This post will change NOTHING about your expectations, if only to further fulfill them. If you’re expecting drivel, that is. If you’re expecting life-altering philosophical musings, you’re fucked. Try somewhere else. I’ve recently become a big fan of Amanda Fucking Palmer’s blog, so maybe try there. I first heard of her by reading Neil Gaiman’s blog, because he’s a literary ninja and I’m a big dork, so I read blogs by people whose books I buy. And they’re dating now, which is cool, because she’s cool and he’s cool and it’s cool when cool people get together.
See how blogs make you feel like you know people you’ve never really met (regardless of the fact that I did once meet Neil Gaiman, but it was at a comic con and he was signing books so I was just one of thousands of people in line that day so it’s not like we actually met and hung out, but anyway, that was just a kind of full-disclosure thing in case anyone gave a shit. Which you didn’t. So there.).
I did mention drivel, right?
This is what you get on a Sunday night while I’m watching (peripherally) people play poker on the internet for enough money to pay off my mortgage (twice if you take first place) and waiting for the final table to start so I can begin to pay more direct attention, then crank out a thousand words or so for the PokerStars blog, then maybe spew forth another few hundred works for PokerNews before I go to bed, thinking all the while that it’s a good thing I chose to be off Monday when given the option to be off Thursday or Monday for the July 4th holiday. Which I thought was odd, since we were closed on Friday the 3rd, and Saturday, which was actually the 4th, but if you wanna give me an extra day off, I’ll get right on that, bossman.
So I finished the first draft of my novel this week, which is an excellent thing. There are several things I want to go back and touch on with it, but the bulk of the work is done. So now I’ve stared sending out query letters to agents to see about getting it published. I may end up going the self-publish route, simply because I’m an impatient shit and I don’t want to wait to hear back from people, but that will require some capital that I’m not completely in possession of right now. But there are a bunch of options there, and while the potential for sales is likely lower, the potential percentage profit is greater. And since I didn’t write the thing thinking I was going to get rich and famous for it, anything that happens with it now is better than nothing.
And I’ve got the next project ready to get going already. I’m not sure of the format yet, either a graphic novel (which would be a whole new format that I’d have to learn how to write in, but might be interesting) or another novel. This one’s about vampires, teenage vampires specifically. Angsty, snarky teenage vampires, not the sexy Twilight-y teenage vampires. Imagine if Anthony Michael Hall’s character from Sixteen Candles got turned into a vampire, and then went and turned his best friend Wesley Crusher into a vamp. At first, they’d think it was the coolest thing since sliced bread, because they’re teenage geeks. But after about 20 years of being sixteen years old, and not even being able to go into a DMX and get an ID that says different, being a teenage vampire would kinda suck. I mean, here you are supposed to be this badass bloodsucking chick magnet, but you can’t even get into bars because you got turned before you outgrew your acne!
That would suck (pun completely intended). So I’m not sure what the plan is with that, but there’s going to be at least one scene that opens with light streaming out from under a crypt door and a whole lotta PS3 going on. Because that’s what you get when you give a dork high-speed internet and a shiny MacBook. And that’s really all I am at the heart of things: a dork with a Mac and a cable modem.