It’s sad that my posting here has gotten so sporadic that it’s worthy of comment, but honestly, there’s only so much time in the day between writing, social media, binge-watching TrueBlood (no spoilers, fuckers, I’m only on Season 5) and building and re-building my Magic decks.

I said decks. Get your minds out of the gutter.

And while you’re getting your minds out of the gutter, get your asses to Winston-Salem, NC next weekend (July 11-13) for the first ever ConGregate SF & Fantasy con! A group of veteran con runners has gotten together with a bunch of awesome guests (and me, but there’s gotta some filler in the sausage) to put on the Piedmont Triad’s newest con!

Some of you may know that Greensboro’s StellarCon is on hiatus for a while, so hopefully this will fill the void and supplement that show when/if it comes back. I enjoyed the one StellarCon I went to, but it overlapped with Connooga, which had triple the attendance, so I had to pick that one the next year.

So here’s my ConGregate schedule –

Friday

4PM – Signing with AJ Hartley – I always love hanging out with AJ, and he’s got a new audiobook out where Thorin Oakenshield reads his (and James Hewson’s) novelization of Omlet, Prince of Danish. If you don’t get that joke, you don’t hang out with enough Shakespeare nerds in bars. And there are enough Shakespeare nerds at ConGregate to remedy that problem.

8PM – Writing “the Other” – Yes, I am a straight white man on a panel about writing outsiders in society. But I asked to be on the panel, because it is something I write and something I’m interested in, and there are women (!) and people of color (!!) on the panel.

10PM – What are “You” Reading? – this is an audience participation panel, where people bring books to talk about and tell what they’re reading and why. I’m going to bring some books to give away! I don’t know what yet, I just thought of it as I was typing this. I gotta go email some publishers! BRB.

Okay, email sent. So hopefully I’ll have some new books in addition to some gems off my bookshelves for you at ConGregate!

Saturday

10AM –Fuck. I know. That’s pretty damned early. And I’m moderating back-to-back panels. BUT, they’re pretty damned cool panels. In the first one – at 10AM – we will “Build a Big Bad Radioactive Bug” – the panel and audience will create a monster. A badass but beatable monster designed by committee. I know, it’s gonna be an elephant. Or a platypus.

11AM – Part 2 – An entirely new panel will have to come up with ways to “Kill the Big Bad Radioactive Bug” that we built in the first panel. I wish Jason Cordova was gonna be here – this is totally up his kaiju alley.

5PM – Signing with James Maxey. Or James the Lesser as he shall now be know thanks to his incredible fitness regime and weight loss over the last few years. Always fun hanging with James. Come buy my shit.

Sunday

1PM – Fairies and Vampires and Shit – I know that’s not the real title, but that’s what you’re gonna get outta me on Sunday afternoon. At least by this point my hangover will be gone. This should be a fun wrap-up, light and frothy and talking about made-up shit that goes bump in the night.

 

You may notice I am not doing a reading at this con. I hate reading my prose aloud, honestly, and I hate sitting through readings of other people’s prose. The lone exception is the Tiny Pirate Ninja Theatre that Misty Massey and I created during our readings at Mysticon a couple years ago. If there are toys, and a potential for mayhem, then I suppose it’s alright.

And when is “Alright” going to become a real word? It’s pissing me off. But I digress.

I once heard someone misread Peter David’s column of that name as “Booty Deegress” and have wanted to say it that was ever since, but I’m always afraid no one will understand what I’m saying or they’ll just think I don’t know how to pronounce digress and am stupid. Booty deegress.

So I’m not doing a reading, but I promise to carry books of my poetry with me and if you buy me a drink I’ll read a poem in the bar, in full performance voice. Seriously. I dare you.

Hope to see all y’all at ConGregate!

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